lets pretend

Hey,

I read a news article this morning. Btw, I got up at 1.15pm. Hell yeah, like good old college day. I needed the rest. And I got it. Mom never got mad at me. lol. So the article was related to how to get things you want in your life. And the solution was pretending you already have it. Damn, that related to that book, the secret. Thoughts will give you what you want. So let me pretend something that I want.

I and cs are together officially. Our parents know about it and so does the friend circle. We meet up and hang around in city. Holding each others hand, look in each others eyes and get lost in a whole new world. We share stories, we kiss slowly, we laugh, we enjoy, she is the world to me and same is true for her. There is no barrier that can hold us back. We are together, we are one!

Damn, the above thing is what I want badly. I wanted to get in a relationship and look, cs entered my life. Truly amazing. She is the first thing on my mind when I get up. And that makes my day! Thank you girl. And After so many days, I read whole newspaper in one go. I don’t feel like reading news in the week days. Missed breakfast. I hate that. Direct lunch. I feel like my appetite is decreasing day by day. I don’t feel like eating too much. Strange.

Watched a movie this afternoon. Paan singh tomar. A true story based on an athlete’s life. Steeplechase champion and national record holder. It’s really sad that because of less training facilities in India, so much talent gets wasted. Sports are neglected. No one recognizes a sports person apart from a cricket player. He brought glory to country what has country given him? Injustice. He is not alone. There are bunch of other guys who won medals for country but were never  appreciated. Never got their limelight. Sad that he had to die as a dacoit, no a rebel. Just feel sorry for those guys who sacrifice so much for country. Give blood, sweat and tears. And get nothing in return. Epic movie anyway.

Evening in gym. Cardio. Yesterday’s rest seem to be working in a positive manner on me. rb was there. Damn, he came just after smoking. Bad breath ruined my mood and workout. Leave smoking dude, I said him so much times. Drinking and smoking are one way ticket to hell. Nothing else. I was so tired at the end of the day. I still feel like keeping the blog aside and sleeping. But it’s almost done. Tomorrow will be an epic day. High school reunion! Epic things will happen. Waiting for it.

friday the 13th

One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you have always wanted. Do it now. – Paulo Coelho.

Hey,

Friday the 13^th. That creepy day appearing 3 times this year. I don’t know about superstition stuff but my day at work was super boring. It was like a motiveless day. When you have something to do but you don’t feel like doing it. Playing games, reading news, tweeting and what not. I tried bunch of things to get out of boredom.

Damn, I don’t like the two senior guys in our cabin. They both are freak. Look at me in such a manner that they have something against me. Thirsty for bloody revenge on me. Wtf. Fucking hell, I won’t mind shifting my place to where I was originally. The book we are made to read is so shitty. Here is how I would describe that. First they scare you, then they give you complex code, then they make you cry and then you quit! Perfect way to describe that book. I’ll shift to basics first. What kind of shitty author is that guy? He totally sucks at writing a book. Get a life dude.

A senior guy was leaving company today. So in lunch people were discussing the shit they were going to do. Food and then playing games. food was ok but games. what kind of games, I asked. The reply was epic. Cards or monopoly! Seriously? I’ll fucking go for a night out to fucking play that monopoly shit? Come on you gotta be kidding. I thought he would reply with playing Max Payne or Fifa on Xbox or something. Shit. Cs was in full mood about giving epic replies to the questions people were discussing. She is the life of lunch break discussions. Queen of good and funny times? May be.

Post lunch session, we sat together on same table. I needed to talk. That was getting uber boring. I like talking to her. May be so does she. She was playing romantic songs. Was that a cue for me? Because she behaves nicely to everyone. I can’t take things for granted with her. Also, she doesn’t share personal things with everyone. Lol. Plus point to me. I needed a break. Things are looking like they have hit a barrier. Our relationship is blooming but not at a great speed. I may be anticipating things too quickly. May be things go slow usually. But I know best will happen. Lol. Love is a slow poison, eh? I love this slow poison then. Take it easy mate. Best will happen. I believe it.

Damn, due to that fellow’s farewell program, I had to bunk the gym. And cs almost skipped her half the meal. He talks too much. Anyhow, cake was awesome. So creamy and chocolaty. Loved it. Me and cs left early. We met this office colleague on street. Trying to catch a taxi. But no luck. when cs saw it, she immediately tried to take a baggage from his hand and help him find a taxi. Gosh, I just looked in awe. How friendly and helpful can a person be? I was kind of proud of her. Hmm. Proud to have such awesome girl in my life.

I just wanted to watch some video tutorials after coming home. But YouTube ate up all of my time. no worries, tomorrow never dies. Yeah, good night! Best will happen!

–rd

first professional project!

Easy reading is damn hard writing. Nathaniel Hawthorne

Hey,

Today I am sad and happy, proud and worried, responsible and confused. Such things happen in my life. I wasn’t able to celebrate happiness. It was happiness when only you get the cake and your pals get nothing. I hate it when just I get what I want. What about my pals who were supposed to be on the same boat as that of me? Why leave them alone?

It wasn’t a great day. Just normal. When I rush to office and the usual routine. I get there. I check my gmail. I check my facebook. I read news. I get bored. And then I start with learning. No worries till now. For cs, it was some religious day today. She was fasting for the whole day. Poor girl, how could she manage that? Sometimes I feel proud of her pure thoughts. I feel grateful that I met this girl. I never ever thought in my entire life that there could be such a girl living in 21^st century in Mumbai totally devoted to religion. If I involve in her too much then she might convert me. lol. For the first time ever in my life, I gave control of my email account to someone else. In cyber world, I am one hell of a paranoid. I don’t know how could I do that? I trust her? So much? Is she getting my cues? Or am I making fool of myself?

Today’s lunch was in canteen. I was fully opened up and talked my heart out. Why wouldn’t I? The topic was football. They say the lunch is canteen is hygienic. I don’t know. After lunch, I got call from director. He wanted to meet me. I was excited. May be he was assigning me my first ever professional project? I asked cs to be prepared as he may call her next. This was best and worst part of my day. Best because I was assigned to a project and worst because, cs wasn’t given such privilege. She was sad. Kind of angry at me. May be jealous? I wanted to talk to her regarding that but what would I say? May be this is better for her to wait for some more time. Or maybe tomorrow even she may be joining me in the project. Who knows? I would absolutely love that. Both of us on same project. Wow. Please let this happen! I would be happier for that. Project leaders didn’t look so happy. Maybe they wanted cs to be with them. Gender discrimination sucks! Girls always get unfair advantage. Just because they are girls? I just want both of us happy and together. Rest doesn’t matter.

She left early today. Clearly from her voice, she was still upset. I felt responsible. But again in confusion over am I really prepared to handle it? I mean the people involved are truly amazing. But I am still confused over my readiness. There is no save game editor for this. Lol. Life has no hacks. You know, what I want to do? I want to leave a mark of my intelligence and knowledge on this project. I want the world at my feet. I want to be the best. I am the best!

It started raining cats and dogs in Mumbai. Thank goodness, I was home before it all started. I couldn’t miss the gym today. I had an appointment. All went smooth. I need protein supplements. I’ll get them as soon as I get my salary. I was supposed to get it today. Why am I not getting it? Oh, it was my best pals birthday today. Wished him at midnight. But couldn’t talk the usual way. he was busy with some celebrations already. Also, called up ak. He was joining today. glad to know he has got into a really nice place. Happy for him. I am grateful to get my hands on my first ever professional project. Thank you! And I found myself taking a break from my supposedly love thoughts. Sigh, now I am understanding that why they say don’t date a girl from office.

–rd